Simply scaling the wall of fear

Today's Tidbit was inspired by Marlene Blaszczyk creator of Motivate Us

As I’ve been reading on-line lately, I’ve seen a lot of information and many posts on fear. It seems that we are all facing our own demons, especially when we try to change something or do something new in our lives.

Doing something new can be a little unnerving or an absolutely terrifying experience. Either way, our fear creates obstacles, procrastination and even failure.

So what are we to do? Many people will glibly tell you to “just do it”, which isn’t bad advice, but it doesn’t really tell me how to get past the paralysis. Here are a few suggestions:

• Grab a buddy
• Zone out
• Sweat it
• Make it concrete

Grab a buddy - Having a friend, colleague or coach who will support you, encourage you and hold you accountable may be just the ticket. A fresh set of eyes can shed a new perspective on your situation and help you see the steps to move you forward. Also, it’s easy to fall into avoidance and procrastination when you are on your own, but having to tell another person you didn’t follow through is often times just the motivation we need to keep us moving.

Zone out - Often times our fears are just stories in our heads, or a whirlwind of small things racing around in our minds until they feel like a hurricane. When we take the time to meditate or pray we create a solid, peaceful foundation and we tap into that which is beyond us, finding enough peace and support to help us see our way forward.

Sweat it - Working up a good sweat makes us feel good. We feel good psychologically because we got out and did something. We feel good physically from the endorphins. Exercise will also clear out the cobwebs and help us stay focused and productive.

Make it concrete - Setting up small, concrete deadlines keeps us moving forward. Now you can focus on one small, doable task at a time. By having a deadline such as an interview, meeting or publishing date for each task you are less likely to procrastinate. Let’s face it, most of us do better with a deadline staring us in the face. You will also be marching steadily toward goal, and reaching it one step at a time.

“Fear grows in darkness; if you think there’s a bogeyman around, turn on the light.” ~ Dorothy Thompson

Fear is there; it is real and it can stop you in your tracks. Don’t let it! There are simple things you can do to move through it so flip a light switch, light a candle or turn on your cell phone and dispel the darkness.

Action: Name your fear. Write it down. Choose one (or more) of the techniques above to move past it. Check back in a week and see if you’re moving through the fear. If so, keep doing what you’re doing and keep checking back. If not, try a different technique.

Recommended Resources!

Ready to go deeper? Try some of these resources!
(The following resources are things we like and believe to be worth your time to look at. Some products are free and some are for purchase. Sometimes we earn a profit, commission, affiliate or an advertising fee when you buy and sometimes we don't. But the resources are always chosen because we see value in them. We hope you agree.)

Who's Looking Over Your Shoulder?

Moving Through Fear - ReclaimU Radio interview with Val Hylen

Feel the Fear . . . and Do It Anyway

It's all about you!

Today's Tidbit is brought to you by Maria Martinez

Simplify your life week; what does that mean…?

Life is too busy. Life is complicated. Life is full of obstacles… If I had a penny for each time I’ve heard these statements, I would be a millionaire. Granted, I too have at one point or another complained about the complexities of life and how busy I often am. Truth is that we tend to over commit ourselves. At the end of the day we are frequently tired and exhausted and with little to no energy to do something for ourselves.

This week is Simplify your Life week and when I learned that it prompted me to think about my own life and schedule. Work-life balance and simplifying lifestyles in order to enjoy more of what we want, is repeatedly, one of the subjects of my coaching conversations.

Why? Because on the quest for the dream; we have stepped on what I call virtual treadmill sometimes from 8 to 10 to even 12 hours per day. That intensity of activity is sometimes necessary; but the point is how long can you do it? How much time will go by before you start feeling the symptoms of stress, fractured relationships, damaged health (such as in excessive weight gain/loss) and even more serious illnesses or injuries. Also, because in that process, you may lose focus of what matters to you, of how to live in line with your true values and of the fact that the key to life after all, is balance.

So, my proposition for you is simple :

Simply: Set the intent.

Make a deliberate commitment to simplify your life (remember the why)

Simply: Prioritize.

Take a pen and paper and write down your top 3-5 priorities. Your future decisions as to how to proceed should link directly related to these priorities.

Simply: Learn to say No.

Goes along with your priorities. If this activity/decision is not going to contribute to those elements you have established as priorities, then you will have to say no. Think about the benefits

Simply: Not all you.

Learn to delegate (and be happy with it) or to get as much help as possible. There are tasks at work and at home that are probably driving you crazy and that can surely be completed by someone other than you.

Simply: Praise yourself.

Start noticing when things are changing; are you feeling better, resting more, have more time for family meals? Take note and appreciate them.

Simply: Don’t beat yourself up; it’s a process.

Remember that giving up some items on your agenda might be difficult at first. This is a process and ultimately, you need to remember that persistence will pay off. Revisit your plan often and adjust as necessary.

The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak. ~Hans Hofmann

At the end of the day, it’s all about you. About what you want and what you deserve. What are you willing to do to get there and what do you need to let go of in order to achieve it? Remember my statement that it is all about balance. You need not to let go of most things completely; unless they are dangerous or damaging. You may also find critical to do something for others as you feel it is your duty. Let me tell you that people will find their way, they will find the solution even if you are not there to do it. And yes, sometimes people will feel angry or disappointed, and they will show you but you need to go back to your vision and mission statement for your life and remember what matters to you and the commitments you agreed to make in order to make it there. Ultimately, when you simplify your life you give yourself permission to recapture time for yourself and your loved ones and to do the things you truly love; isn’t it all worth it?

If you are stuck trying to figure out the right formula for balance; or if you know you need to establish new boundaries for your life and don’t know where to start. If you are caught in the midst of a complicated life and have reached a point where you crave a more simplistic lifestyle; life coaching might be for you.

© 2010 Maria Martinez

Maria Martinez is a Professional Life Coach; she works primarily with individuals seeking to identify areas in which they want to increase their level of awareness and take life to the next level. By providing support and accountability, individuals reach higher and greater goals; balance life at work and at home; and enjoy time doing things they most love. ‘Create the life you want; Start within.’

For more information about Maria Martinez and coaching services go to www.inneractivecoachingonline.com or via e-mail: inneractivecoaching@gmail.com

Recommended Resources!
Ready to go deeper? Try some of these resources!
(The following resources are things we like and believe to be worth your time to look at. Some products are free and some are for purchase. Sometimes we earn a profit, commission, affiliate or an advertising fee when you buy and sometimes we don't. But the resources are always chosen because we see value in them. We hope you agree.)

• I'm on No Right Now: One Little Technique that Takes Off Pressure & Creates Time
  

• What's your time management personality?

When's the last time you ....?

When’s the last time you built a sand castle? I went to the beach with my family yesterday and spent a good deal of time working on a sand castle.

I’ve watched others build them, and I’ve seen many sitting along the shore, but I haven’t built one in years. It looks so simple. If you imagine one that you might build it looks very grand.

And so you begin.

First you discover that you built too close to the water and rouge waves wash away pieces of your structure. So you move inland and try building on the dry sand.

Now you spend a lot of time hauling water from the lake only to have it soaked up so fast it appears you only brought a drop.

You finally find the sweet spot on damp/wet sand where waves won’t wipe you out.

So now you can focus on your structure and really build. Sometimes your sand is too dry and sometimes it is too wet. Then you can’t get your “tower” out of the bucket. Now your daughter tells you that the secret to building a strong structure is layering wet sand and dry sand.

This is complex and there’s a huge learning curve. You think, “But it looks so easy!” Yes, it did. But, as with all things, it’s about trial and error, and you must find joy in the process as well as the result. If the only thing that matters is the result you will spend a lot of time frustrated and unhappy. But if you can stay in a place of wonderment, and enjoy learning and experimenting, then you can begin to reach your destination, and to enjoy the journey as well.

Action: As you struggle to achieve a result, take a moment to list the things you’ve learned along the way and the times you’ve had fun. Be grateful and enjoy the journey. Be happy here and now.

Recommended Resources!
Ready to go deeper? Try some of these resources!

(The following resources are things we like and believe to be worth your time to look at. Some products are free and some are for purchase. Sometimes we earn a profit, commission, affiliate or an advertising fee when you buy and sometimes we don't. But the resources are always chosen because we see value in them. We hope you agree.)

• Inspirational quotes.

• Articles
  Realizing an Idea
  How to Start a Business: Patience, Research, Trial & Error Required
  
  
• Blog Posts
  How to Overcome Obstacles and Limitations as an Entrepreneur
  A Lesson from the Babies
  
  

Are you affected?

As we get older, and our life changes, things are often not what we expected. Take the current times; the days of spending your life working for one company that takes care of you and gives you a gold watch and a pension when you retire are gone. The new economy is here and it’s all about collaboration, cooperation, allegiance to projects rather than companies. It’s about job satisfaction and life balance.

But it also means that you are likely facing a lot of change. Whether you are looking for a new career path or just a way to bring in some extra cash, things are different and it can feel overwhelming. Have no fear (or at least be willing to walk right through it). You can do this. You can shift things, add income and increase your life satisfaction.

This is a new and exciting time. It's a chance to get creative, have more flexibility, try something new and make some big changes that maybe you were too scared or too stuck to try before. It's your opportunity to shine. And it isn't rocket science, all it takes is a little motivation, a dash of courage and an open mind.

Action: Sit back, take a deep breath and look at things with a new and open mind. Think on your dreams, the way you'd like things to be. Look at all the possibilities. Educate yourself, talk to others and add to your list of possibilities. Choose one and take action.

Recommended Resources!

Ready to go deeper? Try some of these resources!

(The following resources are things we like and believe to be worth your time to look at. Some products are free and some are for purchase. Sometimes we earn a profit, commission, affiliate or an advertising fee when you buy and sometimes we don't. But the resources are always chosen because we see value in them. We hope you agree.)

• The Direction Diva is talking about the new economy. Get ideas and tips here

• Books
  Free Agent Nation: How America's New Independent Workers are Transforming the Way We Live
  Inspiration: Your Ultimate Calling (paperback & Kindle versions- the Kindle version is on the right)
  The Slight Edge: Secrets to a Successful Life

• Virtual Event: Should I Drink the Kool-Aid? from The Direction Diva